Sunday, 21 February 2016

BLOG (PERSONAL) -- If I Could Send "D-Mails" or "Time Leap"

Okay -- I just want to say that this entry SPOILS some of the ideas in the visual novel / anime Steins; Gate. So if you haven't experienced it and you want to experience it firsthand through the visual novel or anime series, please do NOT read this blog.


So... ever since I finished playing Steins; Gate on the PS3, the thought of changing the past has been on my mind a lot. As I've mentioned in an older entry regarding time travel, I don't think time travelling is possible at all (even though I really wish it was). But -- I still like to think about the "what ifs". How my life would be if I had selected the other path. What knowledge would I have now? Would my interests change? Would I become a different person?

For those who don't know, D-Mails are electronic messages that are sent back to the past. If successful, the past will get re-constructed and you are left living with the results / consequences of that message. It could be a text, e-mail, pager message, any kind of digital message. In Steins; Gate, there are limitations to the size of the message, and in order to successfully alter the past, the message must be convincing enough so the receiver in the past follows through with the message. Just pretending that I don't have any size limitations and that I am a suave, persuasive person, these are some of the messages I would send to myself:

- 2nd or 3rd place winning lottery numbers for some week. Hahaha... I don't need to win tons of millions of dollars -- I'd just like to win enough that I can relax and focus my time on the things I want to focus on... like creating video games or learning how to play a musical instrument or whatever else.

- Don't kick that pole. Long ago when I was in Middle School, something traumatic happened and I did something stupid and kicked a pole really hard. I didn't realize it at the time, but my toe got a bit messed up from that.

- Wear sneakers to Anime North. One year I wore black sandals to Anime North and it was raining really, really hard. Now my toes act up to extreme cold or hot temperatures. At least... I attribute my toes acting up to that one event.

- Stay single in my last year of high school. I still find it really funny / amusing that on the year I tell myself I have to focus on school and not fall for anybody, I get into my first two relationships. They were NOT at the same time, but they were soon after each other. While I'm not going to say they were horrible relationships, I will say those two relationships really affected my overall perspective which probably had some effect on my relationships after that. I also neglected my school work during that time and my grades dropped, so I wonder sometimes if I could have finished high school with a much better grade if I stayed single. 

- Major in something else. I'm just not sure if what I majored in was something I really wanted to do. I majored in it because my favourite High School teacher told me about it.

- Read more. So... when I was very young, I had a very bad attitude towards reading. I didn't care for it at all until my favourite homeroom teacher lent me a set of novels to read over the Summer. It took me a while to get around to it, but once I did, my world kinda opened up. I think it would have been nice to have that kind of experience earlier. Unfortunately, I don't have much time to read these days, but I still have the interest.

There are other messages I'd send myself -- ones that would have a larger impact on my life -- but I don't think I will share them here.

Time Leaps
So Time Leaps involve sending somebody's memories into their past self. This allows the person to retain all memories up to the point of the time leap, which then allows the person to re-experience the past or make different choices as they continue living back to the present. For example, let's say you are 45 years old and you send your memories to yourself when you were 6 years old. You will then be living as a 6-year-old, but with the memories of the next 39 years. In Steins; Gate, there was a limitation on how far back in the past you can Time Leap to, but just pretending that I can Time Leap to any point in my life... I think I would Time Leap wayyy back to... I think Grade 6.

I think Grade 6 was kinda a major turning point for me. There are definitely some things I would like to re-experience, and some things I would change.

And then, as I get older and older and return back to my "present" age, there would be more things I would re-experience and more things I would change. One example would be re-experiencing some friendships and trying harder to stay in touch. Another example would be to re-taste some limited potato chip flavours (like Fries and Gravy), but also trying not spend too much money on junk food and just saving it instead. One thing I would definitely look forward to re-experiencing is my trip to Japan. Ahhhh... actually, I wouldn't mind Time Leaping to that time almost indefinitely, so I'd be able to experience different things in Japan every time.

One issue I see from Time Leaping though, is, well, I'm so much more shy and quiet now than I was back then. I wonder if I'd be able to actually form the friendships I did back then, or if I'd come off as being too weird and reserved. Another issue is what I'd be able to create. The piece that I consider as my "ultimate poem" in Grade 10 may never exist because my present mindset might not be able to re-create it.

I think if I had a choice between sending a D-Mail or Time Leaping, I would go with Time Leaping. I would unfortunately have to re-experience doing all the homework and going through whatever hardships, but I would take it as almost another crack at my living this life. 

Thanks for reading! If you could send a D-Mail or Time Leap, what would you do? And what would you change or re-experience? As always, if you have any thoughts, feel free.

Take care and have a good week! :)

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