BLOG -- Recap of February

February was pretty uneventful since I was mainly shut up in my room when I wasn't at work. The cold weather really keeps me indoors, since I freeze really fast. I've been kinda itching to go karaoking, but it's too cold... and it gets too dark too soon... ._.

Outings/Events in February:

- Made chocolates at my sister's place for Valentine's Day.

- Hung out with a friend x1.

- Stayed over at my sister's place x2.

- "Traded away" a bunch of my games. That will clean up my room by just a little bit.

- I cleared one of my New Year's Resolutions. It's one of the easy ones... but I'm still happy! lol

- Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn achievements / news: 
-I've unlocked two crafting master book IVs on my main character.
-Ever since patch 3.2, I've been q'ing the old trials more often and I am totally enjoying it. There are several old runs that I really love and I'm glad to be able to experience them again -- even though queue times can still really suck for a dps. Some of my favourite old trials are Ultima HM, Titan EX, Turn 5 Coil, Crystal Tower. I also really love Leviathan EX and Shiva EX, but no real need to run them right now.

Exposures:

- Nothing this month.

Finished...

Watching:

- (Movie): Deadpool -- Overall it was enjoyable, although not all of the humour hit home for me. I liked the love story.

- (Anime): Steins; Gate -- It was really good. Between the video game or the anime series, I'd prefer the video game, though.

Playing:

- (PS3): Steins; Gate -- Very long but very engrossing story. My favourite character is Suzuha. I love her determination, and I want her "tight belly" (as Mr. Braun calls it), lol.

- (3DS): Liberation Maiden -- The story and gameplay didn't really do anything for me, although I liked everything else -- the animations, design, music. I actually played this with my sister since the controls were not left-handed friendly. In this game, you're supposed to use the directional buttons to move your character and also use the stylus to shoot baddies at the same time. Can't really do both of those with one hand so... my sister used the directional buttons and I used the stylus, lol.

- (3DS): Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures -- I beat this in Easy mode and I have no regrets. I think I'd get wayy too frustrated if I tried this on Normal difficulty. The music was decent retro, and the levels were kinda fun... but only if you didn't die too much. My total death count was 314. Total time played was 226 minutes, 50 seconds. 

- (PS4): Never Alone -- It was an okay game. I liked that it had local co-op and some thoughtful puzzles. I kept dying a lot though, lol.

Reading:

- Nothing at this time.

Currently... 

Playing (not all at once):

- (PS4): Dragon Ball Xenoverse
- (PS4): J-Stars Victory Vs+
- (PS4): Hatoful Boyfriend: Holiday Starr
- (PS4): Dragon Quest Heroes: The World Tree's Woe and the Blight Below  
- (PS3): Borderlands 2
- (3DS): Bravely Default 
- (3DS): Fantasy Life
- (3DS): Shantae
- (GBA): The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Anniversary Edition   
- (PSP): Persona 
- (PSP): Crush
- (PSP): Corpse Party
- (PSVita): Persona 4 Golden
- (Wii): Fortune Street 
- (PS2): Atelier Iris 2 
- (PC): UnEpic  
- (PC): King's Bounty: The Legend
- (Mobile): Dragon Quest II

Watching:

- (TV Show): The Walking Dead (Season 5)
- (TV Show): Orphan Black (Season 3)
- (TV Show): Criminal Minds (Season 9)  
- (Anime): Yu Yu Hakusho (don't remember)
- (Anime): Log Horizon (episode 3)
- (Anime): K-On! Season 2 (episode 3)
- (Anime): X TV series (episode 10)

Reading:

- (Manga) Prophecy by Tetsuya Tsutsui (Volume 1) 


That's it for February. Here are a couple of pics I took this month.

 This is some sushi candy-making kit thing that my sister and I tried making.
I'd like to say we were quite successful!

Another shot of the candy sushi.
I thought they would be overly sweet but they weren't.
I especially liked the taste and texture of the fish roe.

Thanks for reading! As usual, if you have any questions / comments about anything, feel free. :)

BLOG -- No Blog Today!

So this blog is to say... there is no blog this week, haha. No, it is NOT because I was too distracted from Final Fantasy XIV to think of something to blog about... though I will admit that I played wayyy too much this weekend. 

I've just been kinda in a rut... so my mood for writing has gone down the drain -- at least for this week.

I've been thinking about something I mentioned in my year-end blog... about not knowing where to throw myself in Life. I don't know why, but it's been on my mind a lot these past days. I mean, I do often think about it, but this time I've been thinking about it to a much higher degree -- to the point where I feel like I can't talk about anything else, and... I don't really want to talk about this, haha... at least not in this space right now, sorry. If I get out of it, I might... but no promises. XP

So if you still dropped by anyway, thanks for dropping by! Next week I should be out of this state, though I will still be thinking about these things.

And just so you didn't come here for nothing, here are a couple of songs I enjoy listening to:

"I'm Just a Kid" from Simple Plan.

Even though it doesn't reflect me 100%, I often feel that this is my... 

"theme song" for my whole life.

"Hacking to the Gate" by Kanako Ito. It's the anime opening theme song to Steins; Gate.

I want to sing this for karaoke one day.

Also... I will totally blog about this series one day!

And... that's all! Take care and thanks for reading! :)

BLOG (PERSONAL) -- If I Could Send "D-Mails" or "Time Leap"

Okay -- I just want to say that this entry SPOILS some of the ideas in the visual novel / anime Steins; Gate. So if you haven't experienced it and you want to experience it firsthand through the visual novel or anime series, please do NOT read this blog.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

So... ever since I finished playing Steins; Gate on the PS3, the thought of changing the past has been on my mind a lot. As I've mentioned in an older entry regarding time travel, I don't think time travelling is possible at all (even though I really wish it was). But -- I still like to think about the "what ifs". How my life would be if I had selected the other path. What knowledge would I have now? Would my interests change? Would I become a different person?

D-Mails

For those who don't know, D-Mails are electronic messages that are sent back to the past. If successful, the past will get re-constructed and you are left living with the results / consequences of that message. It could be a text, e-mail, pager message, any kind of digital message. In Steins; Gate, there are limitations to the size of the message, and in order to successfully alter the past, the message must be convincing enough so the receiver in the past follows through with the message. Just pretending that I don't have any size limitations and that I am a suave, persuasive person, these are some of the messages I would send to myself:

- 2nd or 3rd place winning lottery numbers for some week. Hahaha... I don't need to win tons of millions of dollars -- I'd just like to win enough that I can relax and focus my time on the things I want to focus on... like creating video games or learning how to play a musical instrument or whatever else.

- Don't kick that pole. Long ago when I was in Middle School, something traumatic happened and I did something stupid and kicked a pole really hard. I didn't realize it at the time, but my toe got a bit messed up from that.

- Wear sneakers to Anime North. One year I wore black sandals to Anime North and it was raining really, really hard. Now my toes act up to extreme cold or hot temperatures. At least... I attribute my toes acting up to that one event.

- Stay single in my last year of high school. I still find it really funny / amusing that on the year I tell myself I have to focus on school and not fall for anybody, I get into my first two relationships. They were NOT at the same time, but they were soon after each other. While I'm not going to say they were horrible relationships, I will say those two relationships really affected my overall perspective which probably had some effect on my relationships after that. I also neglected my school work during that time and my grades dropped, so I wonder sometimes if I could have finished high school with a much better grade if I stayed single. 

- Major in something else. I'm just not sure if what I majored in was something I really wanted to do. I majored in it because my favourite High School teacher told me about it.

- Read more. So... when I was very young, I had a very bad attitude towards reading. I didn't care for it at all until my favourite homeroom teacher lent me a set of novels to read over the Summer. It took me a while to get around to it, but once I did, my world kinda opened up. I think it would have been nice to have that kind of experience earlier. Unfortunately, I don't have much time to read these days, but I still have the interest.

There are other messages I'd send myself -- ones that would have a larger impact on my life -- but I don't think I will share them here.

Time Leaps

So Time Leaps involve sending somebody's memories into their past self. This allows the person to retain all memories up to the point of the time leap, which then allows the person to re-experience the past or make different choices as they continue living back to the present. For example, let's say you are 45 years old and you send your memories to yourself when you were 6 years old. You will then be living as a 6-year-old, but with the memories of the next 39 years. In Steins; Gate, there was a limitation on how far back in the past you can Time Leap to, but just pretending that I can Time Leap to any point in my life... I think I would Time Leap wayyy back to... I think Grade 6.

I think Grade 6 was kinda a major turning point for me. There are definitely some things I would like to re-experience, and some things I would change.

And then, as I get older and older and return back to my "present" age, there would be more things I would re-experience and more things I would change. One example would be re-experiencing some friendships and trying harder to stay in touch. Another example would be to re-taste some limited potato chip flavours (like Fries and Gravy), but also trying not spend too much money on junk food and just saving it instead. One thing I would definitely look forward to re-experiencing is my trip to Japan. Ahhhh... actually, I wouldn't mind Time Leaping to that time almost indefinitely, so I'd be able to experience different things in Japan every time.

One issue I see from Time Leaping though, is, well, I'm so much more shy and quiet now than I was back then. I wonder if I'd be able to actually form the friendships I did back then, or if I'd come off as being too weird and reserved. Another issue is what I'd be able to create. The piece that I consider as my "ultimate poem" in Grade 10 may never exist because my present mindset might not be able to re-create it.


I think if I had a choice between sending a D-Mail or Time Leaping, I would go with Time Leaping. I would unfortunately have to re-experience doing all the homework and going through whatever hardships, but I would take it as almost another crack at my living this life. 


Thanks for reading! If you could send a D-Mail or Time Leap, what would you do? And what would you change or re-experience? As always, if you have any thoughts, feel free.

Take care and have a good week! :)

BLOG -- Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day! Here, have some friend chocolates :) My sister and I made them yesterday.

Hope you have a lovely day -- either with a loved one, a friend, family, or with somebody equally as important / worthy of your time. Psst... I'm talking about yourself ;)

That's it for this blog. Thanks for reading! I'm off to enjoy my day -- probably with lots of video games and anime (once I get home). <3

Have a good rest of the weekend, and we shall meet again next week. :)

BLOG (PERSONAL) -- Some of My Non-Negotiables

So... Happy early Lunar New Year! Haha, I often kept forgetting about Lunar New Year because this week I kept thinking, 'Hmmm... what chocolates should I make for Valentine's Day this year?'

As I've mentioned in past Valentine-themed blog entries, I follow the Japanese tradition of making chocolates for Valentine's Day. Even if I don't have anybody to give the chocolates to, I still make them. Often I try a new recipe, but this year I'm going with something I've made before.

Since Valentine's Day is next Sunday, I figured I'd make my Valentine-themed blog today. If anything, next week will be just me posting a pic of the chocolates and me saying "Happy Valentine's Day!".

Before I start, though, I kinda want to say something about the blog I wrote around Valentine's last year. Well... I always felt it was a very weak post -- mainly because I held back on my thoughts. Even now it bugs me which is why I'm clearing it up. In that post, when I started talking about my being Single and how I enjoyed it, I was going to start giving my reasons why and then I was hit with these thoughts:

'Why am I giving reasons for staying single? Why do I need to justify this state? Unless the relationship is abusive, couples don't need to give reasons for being in a relationship... so why do I have to? Why do I have to convince others that I'm okay with being single? Is staying single so unnatural?'

So I stopped writing about it and wrote about something else. Whenever I re-read that post, I think I came off as defensive (which, I guess from reading my thoughts, maybe I was), with how I abruptly changed topics. Okay -- with that off my chest, on to this year's blog.

*******************************************************

Whelp, it is nearing Valentine's Day and again I am single. Whether or not I prefer it this time, it is hard to say. I used to be so adamant with being single because I had to get used to being in that state. Nowadays I guess if I like somebody, I'm open to being in a relationship (with the person I like only), and when I don't like anybody that way, I prefer being single. 

However... even if the other person felt the same way about me and we could start a relationship, there are some things where I feel if we do not agree on, the relationship would not work out in the end. I call these my "Non-Negotiables". No matter how much I may love the other person, if he wants something different from what I want and vice-versa at least for these things, then I think somebody would end up being unhappy and the relationship will end up falling apart. I can only imagine somebody in that kind of relationship would one day think, 'Why can't you want what I want?!!'

Maybe I am being harsh, but this is how I feel. It is okay if the person is indifferent, but if he one day really wants the opposite, then, well... it'd be over. Below are some of these "Non-Negotiables". While I think I am open to compromise with / discuss many things in a relationship, I just don't think these could be.

No Children

So I have many reasons for not wanting children, my main reasons being my lack of confidence in properly raising a child as well as my lack of confidence in this world (sorry for my pessimism). I am also very bad with children -- never knowing how to act around them.

I can't be with somebody who wants kids, because, well -- I just can't take that kind of life away from him. It's way too life-affecting and I kinda think everybody is entitled to at least a shot of a life with children or no children, depending on what they want.

I find it a little amusing that when I tell people that I don't want children, many respond with, "You're just not there yet." Hahaha, no... I don't think I will ever get there.

Area with a Good, Reliable Transit System

I think I am open to living most places, so long as I feel safe and the transit system is good and reliable. If I can live where most major places (library, mall, supermarket, etc.) are within walking distance, that'd be even better.

I just don't want to live anywhere where I'd have to rely on a car to get me places.

Ideally (although this is mostly wishful thinking), I'd like to live in Japan. The transit system is really good there, and I also like the idea of living so close to all the nerdy stuff I like (anime, video games, maid cafes, etc.)

Is Monogamous

Long ago, one of my friends told me this (rephrased 'cuz I don't exactly remember her wording): "With relationships, there are mainly two types of people: people who are monogamous, and people who are polygamous. Relationships do not work if one person is monogamous and the other is polygamous." When thinking about it, it makes a lot of sense.

With this, the other person has to feel the same way -- he can't feel indifferent about it.

For me, I can only like one person at a time. I would never be okay with being in a relationship where the other person is fine with being in multiple relationships. I would also not be okay with being in a relationship where the other person liked another person romantically. Even if it may be the most normal thing in the world, it just doesn't make sense to me. Exceptions are celebrities since I think those are more out of admiration / respect than romance.


That's it for this blog. Do you have any "Non-Negotiables" when it comes to relationships?

As a send off, below is a funny poem about Love from slam poet Taylor Mali.

"How Falling in Love is Like Owning a Dog" by Taylor Mali.

I think this poem is cute.

Thanks for reading and Happy early Lunar New Year! :)